PINOPROSESO.ANG.DISENYO.NG.PAHINA

 hunnie's (akhie) unaware that i wrote this entry. at this very moment, he's asleep in his room :)

We thought that it was the "right love at the wrong time" [remember filip11 videoke? haha ;)]. I never regret everything, how we ended up just friends again. It made us realize that we need each other more. You were with Junelle and I was with my 'dear' friend. IT WAS HARD LETTING YOU GO - - but then again, I never did – I held on even if the pain dared me to let go – sometimes, we just have to.period. All those sleepless nights. The unending tears. Hatred filling up my heart. The agony of losing the most important person. Picturing you with her was the most painful thing. It was hell for me. Still, the good memories remain. I just have to fix this mishap cause I know you wouldn’t even dare - - you were too ma-pride back then. Becoming a 'best friend' was another thing. I remember telling you “magkagirl friend ka na, kahit na sino, wag lang si Junelle” (ah.my favorite line) ~ I will never forgive her for all the things that she did [to you] ~ oh yes, you were too TANGA before [you admit it nmn now eh and I'm proud of you - same lang naman tayo ng situation eh]. I was okay with it but the love was always there, it will never fade away, we both know that. I never thought we'd be friends again..I was hurt, you were too..we never really understood what happened, why we fell apart..i guess everything was just so fast that in just a blink, we were taking different paths already. Wanna know another painful feeling? Trying to tell your heart that your just best friends when you know that you love him so much to be that, that you can’t be lovers again. Oftentimes, I would deny my love for you, but I guess my heart was stronger and smarter than me. I finally had the guts to fall in love again with somebody else. Wow. It was something alright. Hun, you know him, how close we became. We were enjoying each others company – very much. But in the end, I was only trying to fool myself; at the end of the day, you are the last person on my mind before i shut my eyes. I loved you more and more even if we were already living our separate lives, despite the hurt that you caused me, the greatest pain I could ever imagine. Imagine, we went through a lot of sacrifices to be with each other and we would end up putting our relationship in the trash bin. August 9, 2006 – your special day right? I made it extra special just for you. The surprise was just something I thought of. Recollection - you told me that you still love me? It was bullshit for me really [It was just my pride playing tricks on me – the pride that I never had all my life]. As weeks passed, we became closer than before; I suddenly realized that you do love me, much more than the love anyone has ever given and could give me, it was incomparable. Knowing that we both love each other still was a hard thing. You were still with ‘the monster’ (that was our code name for Junelle before dba, pano ba natin nakuha un?). It was really hard. It was painful for me cause you love me but your not mine. How is that possible? I almost gave up my love for you just so you could be happy with her, I was so madrama trying to tell myself na ‘sagabal lang ako’ – eh pano un? Ako nga mahal mo. kulit! I know you were already in bad terms. The day you texted me na you weren’t together na was a really happy one for me. Aside from you being seperated from the MONSTER, it would give you the freedom that you have always wanted and NEEDED.  0ctober 2, 2006 – we got back together. Hun, I was the happiest person alive. You just don’t know how ecstatic I was that day. Of course we were still in denial but we really are BACK TOGETHER. Hun, this is my happiest. Being with you again is such a blessing. This was the close to perfect relationship I have always wanted. Hun, like what I always tell you, I wouldn’t trade this for anything else in this world. I wouldn’t even trade this for a bmw z4 or a Ferrari-enzo or a supra.hehe. We are two slightly different people so madly in love with each other. This feeling is real. WE are.you are the best thing in my life. This is it.I am at my happiest.

Hunnie ko, I just want to thank you for holding on. For loving me no matter what..even if we woud always fight about petty stuff or even if I always misunderstand what your trying to point out and make tampo. For picking me up sa dorm and bringing me back safely. For playing with me kahit na 400 ang nagagastos natin sa timezone. For allowing me to treat you kahit mahal :) for sunday mass. for mall tambays.For baywalk kagaguhan and laftrip. For the october 7, you know what-divisoria-more and more. for treating me. for making me happy all the time and laugh out loud - you know naman na i love seeing you dance a crazy and stupid dance. for bringing me to places ive never been. for all the lrt trip. for dancing swing with me. for letting me take candid pictures of you no matter how stupid it looks. FOR WEARING BOXERS AND SANDO DAHIL ANG CUTE CUTE MO TLGA!!! for bringing me to your humble home and meeting the wonderful Sison family/clan? :) for bringing me back to the dorm from navotas even if your hella tired. for all the sweet nonsense/cheesyness you always tell me..haha..for calling me beautiful always. for making me smile pag nanggigigil ka na *you know that*. for calling me cute every morning dahil teary eyed pa ko pagkagising. hun, alam mo bang ang happy ko pagnagigising ako tapos ikaw katabi ko:) for the endless secrets we both share. for treating me sa jeep. for allowing me to bite you or pinch you!!rarr. for waiting for me kahit ang tagal tagal kong mag-ayos ng sarili. for letting me copy sa algeb and for letting me take the wheel when it comes to english subjects. for allowing me to make you asar or mock you. for holding my hand while we stroll. for calling me hunnie in front of your family, haha. :) FOR THE SWEET KISSES AND MALAMBING NA HUGGS. for making me smile just because..you make me smile a lot noh? for bringin out the best in me. and alot more. I also want you to be happy with me kahit lagi tayong nagtatampuhan..*HUGGIE HUGGIE-CHIMCHIM* sorry na hun..i love you..err..dami ko pag gs2 isabi kaso 12 mn na pala..hehe..:) my asawa ;D

I guess what I'm trying to say is that thank you for making my heart beat with joy. you truly are my ecstasy..uh..in Layman's term..I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. I'm gonna love you more than anyone ;)

always <3 forever,

Charlotte your hunniebabewifeycarebeardarnapusa..ang haba tlga hun!